A Letter to Cool Guys in School

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bully quotes

Original photo by: alvimann

A Letter to Cool Guys in School is a heartfelt letter of the month for March of an avowed “school nerd” to his former friends who now consider themselves as the “cool guys”.

 

March 10, 2013

Hey yo!  What’s up?  Wassup cool guys?

Oh, even in letter form, my greetings sound so lame compared to how you do it.

Anyway, since this is my letter, you won’t have the chance to tell me what to do so here goes.

Has it been that long ago when we were all young boys having no difference between a nerd and a cool guy?  We pretty much enjoyed playing like young  boys do with no image to maintain.  Even when I was always the reserved one and most of you were the rowdy ones, you considered me your friend and I was happy about that.

As we all grew older, I remained as reserved as ever, generally a non-participant in sports activities, and with my special talent yet to be discovered.  Most of you however joined sports teams, excelled in dancing or singing, and became popular because of varying reasons.  Some of you even became notorious bullies focusing on easy and nerdy  targets like me.

What I don’t understand is that most of you are good to me when interacting with me alone.  In front of the other so-called cool guys though, you start acting up as if wanting to prove something.  Most of you make jokes at my expense and that confuses me a lot.  How can you be good to me one moment and cruel to me the next?  Are most of you deranged or something?

I understand if you cool guys have an image to maintain but can all of you please do that not at my expense?   If being near a nerd like me affects your social status somehow, can you please not go to me anymore when you need something.  My parents get very angry when they sense that some of you are using me somehow so I have to hide helping you from them.  You all know so well that I cannot refuse anyone who asks for help.

Some of you had advised to me to reinvent myself so I can be one of you.  I’m not very sure about that, not very sure if I want to cross the borderline between good boy and bad in order to be cool. Without exceptional talent, those who would like to be cool try to find attention in some other way.

Someday maybe I can be one cool guy on my own terms.  I’ve always imagined being one and I do envy most of you sometimes.

Aiming to be cool,

Guest Letter Writer

 

About the Guest Letter Writer:

Our guest letter writer is a 12-year old boy who has been bullied one time too many by people who he considered friends at one time.

 

 

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Teresa Martinez

A freelance researcher-writer who has continuously been in such field for more than 10 years. Previous to that, her work experiences are in the banking, advertising, and cooperative industries. More of her work in Google+

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27 Responses to “A Letter to Cool Guys in School”

  1. i can relate this story to my teen son. i always tell him to be just himself when in the company of peers. that never act what he’s not just to please others.

    Have a blessed Good Friday.

    • Teresa Martinez says:

      I also always tell my son not to be pressured by his classmates or friends into doing what he does not like but we know it’s difficult for them because of their tender age. We just need to continuously guide them.

  2. peer pressure and bullying is a major concern for parents with teens. we have to teach our children to “stay cool” just the way they are and not the way their friends are.

  3. Rovie says:

    I can somwhow relate to the guest letter writer since my nephew is also 13 years old. Bullies are common in school and I hope that parents and teachers can do something to prevent it.

    • Teresa Martinez says:

      What is more difficult is to have former friends bully you since they are the last people you would expect to do that.

  4. Algene says:

    I also believe in him. One day, he will not be one of the cool guys but definitely the best 🙂

    • Teresa Martinez says:

      Yes, I do believe that good things come to those who choose to remain true to themselves even under pressure.

  5. This reminds me of the party we have attended this weekend. The Mom told his teen son not to go out because it was raining and he badmouth on her and looked at his friends like it was cool. The Mom did not say anything which makes me a little uneasy. I don’t think I would let my kids talked to me that way in public. Being cool is okay but being disrespectful isn’t.

    • Teresa Martinez says:

      You are perfectly right here. Children must be told when they are crossing the line and then appears to be proud of it. Parents should make it clear that such actions are not tolerated.

  6. Too sad but true: bullies are everywhere. Even my 6 year-old daughter who tries Public schooling for the first time this year has related lots of incidents to me of bullying at school. I think there is nothing wrong with being cool. It’s when guys become rude, disrescpectful, and bully that is not good at all.

    • Teresa Martinez says:

      It’s about time that young people understand what it really means to be cool. It is not about popularity, fashion trends, or techie gadgets. It is about being a real person in relation to others.

  7. over dinner last night, my teen was telling about this “super guy” in his class who use to get a lot of attention because of his “boisterousness” -“but, that was it” he said. because his “super coolness” makes avoid him” he added.

    • Teresa Martinez says:

      The young really need guidance in this area. It’s a good thing your child knows the difference.

  8. Ah, my son is the Astig type not a cool guy. But I always remind him to act with respect to anybody.

    • Teresa Martinez says:

      That is a good reminder to the young since many of them are under the impression that it is cool to be be able to manipulate their parents and the people around them and even make a show out of it.

  9. What a brave young man for sharing his feelings in his writing 🙂 I hate the bullies, they are nothing but coward 🙁 I hope that one day he’ll be the cool guy 🙂

  10. Lainybelle says:

    Peer pressure and bullying is a common scenario for a young man. It must have been so tough for the writer of this letter.

    Respect is something that these bullies don’t have in their system and it can never be learned in school. Proper guidance and counselling for young guys undergoing the same thing is deemed very essential coz his self-esteem and individual countenance will be greatly affected once it’s not properly addressed.

    • Teresa Martinez says:

      Young people are in constant need of guidance especially if they are being subjected to extreme peer pressure. The usual problem though is when they don’t inform their parents of what they’re going through thus parents need to be extra sensitive for the signs.

  11. Bullying is not really good though we can’t really stop it unless people are monitored more than 24 hours is fine. It is not cool at all if you bully someone. We can call those bullies trash in the society that takes advantage of those kids who wants to be at peace. xx

    • Teresa Martinez says:

      Many bullies are simply misguided although there are those who we can term as almost “criminally-inclined” and these are what parents have to look out for.

  12. MC says:

    Though this letter is coming from a boy and for a boy, I can relate. There are also issues for cool girls and the nerd ones like me. I used to be a nerd girl way back high school’s freshmen days. They bully me even though some of them grew up with me together. They became cool and I didn’t.
    But the hell I care. I was focused on my studies ad now, I am now claiming my price.

    My message to the kids like this boy who wrote this letter, don’t get too pressured for the call of being cool. Being cool is just temporary. It won’t really matter when we all gets old.

  13. Justin says:

    wow.. I can so relate to this.. the novel I am writing right now actually talks about a small guy who has been bullied a lot and sometimes I question myself: why do they do such things? I mean, why bully someone?? I may not know him personally but if he could listen to me, I’d like to tell him to hold on and stay strong.. be true to who you are.. people might find you as reserved, introvert and awkward but there is a special place for you.. do not try to be someone who you are not.. and besides, stay happy.. smile.. there’s a whole lot of reasons to smile despite of everything we are suffering from.. hope you have a good day!

    p.s.: awkward can be cool too! 🙂

    love,

    someone who is just like you! ^_^

  14. a very cool letter! truly reflects the kids in school and the students now a days that needs to maintain some name for their own sake. But true that there is a special place for everyone!

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